Article III - Personal Boundries


Section 1: No man shall ever use another mans Chap Stick

Section 2: Two men should never ride on the same step of an escalator at the same time. (Ron in Seattle)

Section 3: No man shall massage another man unless professionally certified to do so. (Stephen)

Section 4: No man shall ever sit on another mans lap. (Jay in Edmonds)

Section 5: When using a carousel door, only one man per cell. (Jeremy from Burlington)

Section 6: No two men in a hot tub should sit next to one another unless all four sides are already taken. (Nick in Godknowswhere)

Section 7: No man should ever tickle another man (Dan)

Section 8: No man should touch the small of another man’s back! Especially to get by in a crowded bar. (Chris in Milton)

Section 9: No man shall ever sit in the seat directly next to another man at a movie theatre, unless there are no other seats available, or he is in a mixed sex party (James In Olympia)

Section 10: Never touch another mans hair and comment on it... it's creepy. (Paul from Fedtown)

Section 11: Never grab something out of another mans pocket (Bennett from Renton)

Section 12: No man shall ever use another mans toothbrush. (F'n Stephen)

Section 13: A man should never ask for details from another man regarding personal matters like divorce. If he wants you to know he will tell you. (Eric in Maple Valley)

Section 14: Hand Shake etiquette: (Shaun)

•    Subsection A: Grip must be firm but not overpowering, using the entire RIGHT hand.

•    Subsection B: No finger gripping.

•    Subsection C: Look the man square in the eye.

•    Subsection D: Shake will not to last longer then 3 seconds.

•    Subsection E: Do not place left hand on top of the handshake, unless making a pact with three (3) or more people.

Section 15: Guidelines for the Man hug (Alex in Redmond)

•    Subsection A: No back rubbing.

•    Subsection B: No resting of the chin on his shoulder.

•    Subsection C: No sighing, crying, closing of the eyes, or speaking.

•    Subsection D: Shall not last longer then 2 seconds.

Section 16: Under no circumstances should a man give another man a piggy back ride. Unless said piggy backer was injured doing something manly. (Jesse in Olympia)

Section 17: Do not brush a stray eyelash from another mans cheek. Ever. (Mike)

Section 18: No man shall rub suntan lotion on another man unless it is on his back and there is no woman around. (Fritz)

Section 19: No man should ever change another mans radio station, especially when said man is listening to The Mens Room. (Ian at Boeing)

Section 20: No man shall eat another mans food without permission. (Jolly Joe)

Section 21: Never order food for another man. (Dan in Puyallup)

Section 22: When choosing a seat at a fast food restaurant that has lots of open seating. No man shall ever sit at a table in front of another person, and then face TOWARDS the guy who was sitting first. (Dave in Renton)

Section 23: No man shall ever share on-line his plans to masturbate or advertise details following completion of said act. (Ryan Castle)

Section 24: On the bus, do not sit next to another man when there are still seats available. (Cade in Seattle)

Section 25: Two men can share a joint but never a straw (J.U.I)

Section 26: Never grab another man's junk. (Miles Montgomery)

Section 27: When crashing at a friends house, no masturbating.

Section 28: No man shall ever reach into a communal bag of chips when it is already occupied by another mans hand.

Section 29: No man shall ever watch or download porn on an other mans computer. (Reed in Ellensburg)

Section 30: If you're helping someone out at their computer, don't wrap your arms around them to type something. (Ronnie in Castle Rock)

Section 31: Under no circumstances shall one man offer to warm another mans hands with his own hands. (Adam in Redmond)

Section 32: No man shall ever kiss another man's hand. (R.G. in Silverdale)

Section 33: Never mess with another mans thermostat. (Colin from Mercer Island)

Section 34: No man shall come up behind another man and hump him. (Evan in Oak Harbor)

Section 35: While waiting in line, leave enough room so that the person in front of you cannot feel your breath. (Rich in Pacific)

Section 36: A man shall stay the F out of another-mans relationship.

Section 37: Don't make excessive phone calls to another man. If he doesn't answer the first time, leave a message on the second call then NO MORE CALLS! (Jamie from Issaquah)

Section 38: No man shall cup another mans face and wipe away his tears. (Jonathan in Irving)

Section 39: While in line, don't stand so close to the guy in front of you that he can't even reach into his back pocket to grab his wallet without touching you. (Jesse the Gardener)

Section 40: Don't ever wear that nasty patchouli stuff. (Joeski)

Section 41: No man, under any circumstances, shall lift his shirt over his belly and rub his belly and finger his belly hole outside the comfort of his own home. (Jorge in Spanaway)

Section 42: A man should mind his own damn business unless he is forced to break up a bad situation.

Section 43: No man shall share a Jacuzzi tub with another man if that tub is located inside of a bathroom.

Section 44: If you don't know him, don't wink at him.

Section 45: No man shall clip his nails in public, especially on public transportation. (CaptainMyloTron)

Section 46: Don't bang your friends mom.

Section 47: No man shall ever share drugs without telling if it's laced. (Larry Lovestein)